First Seal Release

Today is the day of the first seal release.  We have come a long way together over such a short period of time.  The veterinarian pulled out pictures of some of the first seals from when they initially arrived at the center and, what a difference!  Those adorable, fluffy white creatures cowering in bath tubs have grown up to be big, fat sausages living it up in the above-ground pools.  That time has been a learning and growing process for us all with a string of challenges and successes along the way.   

To start, there was the fear of gavage feeding, for the seals, gradually coming to understand that this is what fills their bellies with food, and for the interns trying to master this technique for the first time.  Before too long, we were bombarded by seals, who could not be fed quickly enough, in spite of all our attempts to organize and hustle.  The older pups soon learned to swallow and eagerly awaited feeding time, and eventually, got booted out of isolation to the outdoor nursery pools to make room for the newcomers.  Even still, there were not enough tubs for all, so they began to be paired up, with some enjoying the company of a buddy, while others seemed to resent sharing and, sometimes, lashed out at their roommate when not distracted and less stressed by swimming at bath time.  They were slowly introduced to fish as play toys in their baths and some did not seem terribly interested, while others mutilated the fish, and a few special individuals quickly taught themselves to swallow it whole.  The pools became increasingly chaotic as more seals graduated to the outdoors, even with the addition of a fourth pool about halfway through the season.   

Currently, there are seventeen seals in isolation, many of which are awaiting their turn to be moved outside, especially since they have already mastered hand-feeding fish.  Only seven more seals have arrived within the past few weeks, and things are slowing down, compared to the forty-something seals crammed into isolation less than two months ago, demanding much attention.  Every day, these pups move one step closer to freedom as they learn to feed in the water or feed themselves by diving after the fish tossed in the pools.  Just a couple of days ago, four pups were witnessed free-feeding and these suspicions were confirmed by their drastic weight gain over a matter of days.   

Now, after arriving at under twenty pounds, our first four seals, weighing in at around sixty pounds each, will be released today from the northeast of the island.  It is apparently a seal haven a short swim from here with lots of rock beds, less populated islands, and likely a wealth of food sources.  I wonder at how they will fair, how easily they will be accepted by established herds, how much of a shock to their systems the sea will be, especially as they hunt for their own food.  It is a day of mixed emotions with sadness at seeing our babies head out into the real world on their own and happiness that they made it to this point; that together, we successfully achieved the mission that we had set out to fulfill.

Procrastination and Other Thoughts

I have been procrastinating with journaling.  Lots of little things happen on a day to day basis, eventually accumulating to a number that is overwhelming to consider tackling with the written word, especially as they have already begun to escape, as my memory is no steel trap.  That is my excuse, and limited time, I suppose.  When I am done with work, I do not feel like doing much of anything, even the things that I generally would like to do for myself.  I have to push myself out for hikes on my day off, otherwise, it might not happen, or any other physical activity for that matter.

On my hike yesterday, I got a wake up call to take it easy on myself and pay closer attention to all of my surroundings, as I stepped up and hit my head straight into a tree that was growing bent over the trail.  I sat down to recover and was sore for a bit, before continuing on up the hill, as I did not want that to be an excuse to end my time out.  Worse things could happen as deterrents, but as long as I learned my lesson, I would likely be fine.  I managed to avoid further bumps in this particular "road". 

Someone was looking at the wildlife center's pictures the intern computer, and the one that was still up on the screen was of a seal pup, when he first arrived in June. What a change!  It is hard to believe that only about two months ago, he was a fluffy white thing, far less than twenty pounds.  He is now nearly fully grown and fat and eating whole fish on his own in a big pool with other seals on the fast track to release.  They all seemed so fragile and helpless when they arrived in June and early July, as many of them were premature and abandoned by their mothers.  Developmental time is so short in much of the animal kingdom.  The birds are even more impressive, as they spend about a week shedding their downy, baby feathers, before they are on solid food, eating on their own, and then off to a woods’ enclosure until they are deemed ready for release.  The process takes no more than a month, it seems. 

Since interns have started to leave, it has become more essential for the rest of us to be trained on the remaining aspects of the seal department, such as caring for those at the outdoor pools.  It is quite different and far more thrilling to see them in their element, healthy and thriving.  Many of them are hand feeding in the water, eagerly following the fish that their feeder wriggles about, imitating live prey.  Once they figure out how to swallow for tube feeding of mashed fish, it does not take long for them to progress along the various stages of feeding development. 

Living a Dream

It came to me that just last year, I was looking down from cliff edges to the ocean below into the little faces of harbor seals, which were peeping out from the water’s surface, staring inquisitively back at me.  I had wondered what it would be like to interact with these creatures, how they live, what their personalities might be like.  At the present moment, while standing beside a bathtub containing a couple of hungry seal pups, I realized that I am doing exactly what I had set out to do.  It was to satisfy a curiosity if nothing else, and perhaps, blown out of proportion as I considered it to be my career destiny, but that is not what is important.  I am living what I am dreaming.  It may not necessarily be logical or rational, but it does not really matter.  Yes, I am searching for my calling in life, a passion that drives me, but in the meantime, I can create amazing experiences for myself.  How many people can say that they had the opportunity to work with wildlife, especially seals?  There are only so many organizations that have licenses to work with or research marine mammals.  This is not just the daily grind, even though it may feel that way, at times, with so much repetition, mounting demands, and stress.

From Trauma to Release

In other news, the rescue season has begun to pick up here.  We are up to twelve premature seals, which can be quite a handful, as they tend to be very weak and can suddenly crash due to hypoglycemia.  Our first seal experienced this shortly after he arrived and several more times over the course of about three days, which required intravenous therapy through the blood vessels of the vertebrate of his spine.  It was quite impressive to watch the veterinarian quickly feel around a bit and poke the needle into exactly the right spot.  Unfortunately, due to the intravenous therapy and often being unconscious, meals had to be skipped, which also did not help his blood sugar level to improve.  The outcome was looking kind of grim, since the veterinarian had never seen a seal crash so many times and over such an extended period of time.  However, he has recovered quite well since then, and on sunny days, is being spoiled with his own private visits to one of the seal nursery pools, as the others are not stable enough to leave isolation at this time. 

It has been quite rewarding to attend the releases of our recovered patients.  Our efforts all seem to be worthwhile in those moments.  Before I arrived at the center, two little goslings (geese babies) came in, still fluffy with their down feathers and took up residence in a baby play pen.  One had a leg injury, I believe from either a dog or cat attack, yet he seemed to be in good spirits.  Later on, they got another buddy, who they took to quite quickly, as they would cuddled up close together with each other and the goslings in their little mirror.  Eventually, they graduated from their play pen to an outdoor enclosure behind the clinic, from which they would always try to follow out whoever was leaving with a stampede of little webbed feet and a chorus of chirps. 

In the bird department, once the leg wound on one injured gosling had healed, the swimming pool was filled for them to begin the waterproofing of their feathers.  Several days later, another group of three other goslings arrived, smaller than our current residents, and they had to be gradually introduced.  The first day that their play pen was moved into the outdoor enclosure, so that they could all see and become familiar with each other, the younger ones were extremely excited, frantically side stepping and pecking at the mesh screen.  It was as if their imaginary friends in their little mirror had suddenly manifested themselves into existence. 

Unfortunately, the older goslings did not take too well to these newcomers, as I discovered when I took the little ones out of their play pen later on to clean it and to see how initial interactions would go.  The older ones immediately took to nipping at and bullying the others, so I frantically switched out all of the soiled linens and moved the little ones back into their safe haven.  Apparently, this behavior is like a rite of passage, an establishment of the pecking order within the group, yet the new goslings were still a bit too fragile to withstand such treatment.  I do not believe that I was on shift the day that they were finally all joined together, and soon after that, they were moved to a larger enclosure in the woods with a luxurious in-ground swimming pool that circulates oxygen and keeps the water somewhat clean.  They were not sure what to make of this new environment and had to be ushered into the water.  They bonded well during the weeks that they spent there together. 

Soon enough, the day of release was at hand.  There are several people on the island, who volunteer their property for wildlife releases and the property that we went to on this particular day had been purchased by a couple to preserve the land as it is for the wildlife.  Their house sits right on the coast and on one side is a little inlet, where a gaggle of geese had been observed regularly in the evenings, so the hope was to integrate our six into this group.  Only two people went down to the beach with the carrier to physically release the goslings, and just like their move to the swimming pool in the woods, they had to be ushered down the beach into the salt water. 

It only took one of them to jump in for the others to follow suit.  The staff were hoping that the goslings would mingle with the family groups of mothers and babies that were slightly younger than themselves, but they instead met up first with some older geese and the establishment of pecking order began.  No one seemed to be seriously beaten on or injured, and they all settled down after a short time, as the newcomers had been accepted.  It became difficult to identify our goslings among the crowd, yet we kept watching from the windows of the garage, fascinated by this socialization process, and feeling satisfied with the payoff of our time and effort spent raising them, like proud parents.

Self-fulfillment and a New Seal

Since my determination a few days ago to focus on and enjoy the present, I have noticed a significant change in my attitude and I have begun to really appreciate my time here and the island itself.  This shift has also coincided with work days becoming fuller, so that I often do not feel like I have completed all that I had wanted to accomplish by the end of my shift.  I started to wonder if actively being a part of a project or work and keeping busy with it legitimately fulfills me or if that activity simply keeps my mind from drifting back to the unhappiness that I seemed to feel only a few days ago.  Even if I am legitimately fulfilled, shouldn't I also be able to feel this way while working on my own projects?  Do these not actually satisfy me or am I approaching them with a rotten frame of mind, believing that they are not nearly as important as the other work that I could be doing, namely work for others? 

I keep returning to this struggle, finding meaning and satisfaction in doing things for others and not always putting myself higher on my priority list.  I do not think that this can all be attributed to cultural morals and the push to not be selfish, but also because I find it easier to help other people.  They can tell you what they want, what they need.  Yet for oneself, one must listen from within, which I feel is far more challenging and quite daunting.  What am I listening for?  What do I sound like?  What is it that I truly want, as I am constantly growing and changing?

I became aware of this tendency to ignore or belittle my own goals and desires over three years ago, and I believe that such an awareness keeps me honest, making it easier to recognize when I am falling back into that old habit.  Ideally, as I continue to encounter it throughout my life, the period of time between regression and realization will become shorter.  Until, at some point, it will only be a flicker of a thought, a faded memory, as I will have learned to cope and live with this flaw.

The first seal came today!  Everyone had started to wonder when the first one would show up and a bet had even been started in anticipation of the event, as they typically begin to arrive at the end of May.  He is a healthy weight for a premature baby at about twenty-one pounds.  Apparently, he had been swimming near the coast all night and was not able to be rescued until this morning.  Now, he lies in his own personal bathtub rapidly dozing off, but suddenly jerking his head up, as if trying to fight off the inevitable sleep.