Letting Out Our Inner Child

It’s fascinating how captivated a child can be with the world around him/her, even with the simplest or most mundane things, like hand-washing laundry, as two little girls sat watching me today.  Everything is fresh and new.  Perhaps, even though a child has dug in the same sandbox day after day, they notice the subtle differences that make this particular moment all its own.  Or maybe they eagerly anticipate changes, knowing that the world is in a constant state of flux.  They remain enthralled by all that they notice, which is quite a lot, as they are always watching, processing, and learning, during the peak years of their development.

It’s equally fascinating that not long ago, adults experienced the world in the very same way.  However, the magic that it once held has disappeared to be replaced by jadedness from our common daily tasks to the overwhelming negative forces at work in the world.  Perhaps, this childhood experience is influential in the decision of many individuals to start a family.  In some distant memories, they can recall the wonder and excitement that the world once held and find themselves secretly missing those feelings.  It seemed to be an experience unique to childhood, so the only obvious way to relive such moments would be through a child.  As the child discovers, the parents reminisce, reliving their childhood and sharing what they hold most dear with their progeny.

While it is important to be so engaged with children, I don’t believe that children are the only ones who get to have all of the fun.  It’s far more challenging to connect with our inner child, to push away the worries, doubts, responsibilities, and horrors of life, for even just a brief moment, to recognize the good that we once saw in it and that still exists.  We need to essentially unlearn much of what has been taught to us about being an adult and how we must conduct ourselves within society, always remaining reserved, keeping busying, and wanting more.  We need to remember how to appreciate the simple things in life and marvel at their existence.

It seems that we are so firmly rooted in these mind sets, these cultural and societal constructs, that it becomes difficult to identify where they end and where our own true values and interests begin.  Maybe, if we revisit our childhood a little more often, whether it be through our memories or through new experiences individually or with our children, we may be able to find some answers and rediscover the wonder and beauty of life.

Where Are the Parents?

Once school lets out for the day, the market, where I work, is swarmed by middle school children, who squander their unspent lunch money on soda, energy drinks, candy, and chips.  One of the adult customers commented on how she used to do the same thing when she was a youth, and voiced how silly it was for the schools’ to make serving only healthy meals a strict policy.  There’s no way to monitor the kids and force them to eat nutritious food. 

She also went on to tell me about the fifteen years that she spent working in day care.  She would take in children from parents, who wanted her to conduct toilet training and teach discipline because they couldn’t be bothered to do so, or even enforce her teachings on their own time at home.  There were still others, who wanted to leave their children with her for twelve hours a day, five days a week. 

With such extreme requests as these, the question arises as to why these individuals had children to begin with?  Was the conception accidental, or as accidental as it can be if a couple neglects to use birth control?  Had they already become jaded by the responsibilities of parenthood or did they not realize it would be a full-time job from the beginning?  Or did it seem like the right next step to start a family, instead of both individuals’ hearts being fully invested in this choice?

Too often today, kids seem to be going unchecked, controlling their parents and, as a result, are a nightmare for anyone else to deal with.  These parents don’t seem to want to do any work, as they keep turning to the schools to completely take care of their children’s well-being from discipline to good study habits and grades to healthy eating.  All of these habits and values must start at home and be instilled at an early age; otherwise the child seems to be nearly unreachable. Unless, hopefully, once they become adults, they will recognize the value of all that their parents wanted them to do, but never taught or enforced.

I understand that it’s a lot of work to be a parent.  One devotes inordinate amounts of time, energy, resources, and money into supporting and raising a child.  But, I believe, that all of the things that one invests mean nothing unless also totally investing oneself.  I feel that many parents of these troubled and misguided children are barely present in their lives, knowing little of what their kids are learning in school, who their friends are, what interests they are developing, and so on.  It’s easier for these parents to just throw money and new gadgets at them to make up for what they’re missing. 

Furthermore, this teaches the kids that they are entitled to have anything that they want.  One day at the market, a middle school boy retorted to my greeting of how he was doing, with something to the effect of not being well because he had to pay for all of the treats that he had loaded onto the counter.  I was so appalled that I couldn’t think of a witty comeback quickly enough.  All I managed was something about how everyone has to pay for the products that they want. 

And with a comment like that, I seriously wonder how many other goodies he had stashed away in his pockets.  It’s entirely possible, since the market has been fraught with thefts by these students.  The problem has reached such magnitude that the kids are no longer allowed to bring their backpacks into the store and only a few may enter at a time, so that they can be closely monitored by the cashier and the sentinel stationed by the door.

I worry about the future outlook for this new generation.

Disconnection from Nature

There tends to be this romanticized idea about how back in the day of the western pioneers, there was a greater respect and appreciation for things in life and the environment.  Perhaps, appreciation for the material things I would agree upon, since these luxury items were difficult to come by in rustic living, yet very useful, as many have now become basic necessities.  To a certain extent, there was a greater connection to nature, as many to lived off of the land, depended on it, and interacted with it directly. 

Yet, due to the overwhelming abundance of natural resources and wildlife at that time, they appear to have been taken for granted from the very moment of the colonists' arrival.  There was no consideration of consequences for future generations or nature itself.  Everyone just lived in the present; survival being the primary focus.  One could catch fish by the hundreds in a matter of hours without a permit or limit, or log acres upon acres of old growth forests to make a quick profit and supply the demands of development and progress.

Materials, time, and back-breaking labor were put into a home, just to be abandoned a few years later for a more appealing tract of land, convenient access to roadways or town center, or better accommodation for an ever-expanding family.  In those days, it seemed so common that every couple would have a minimum of five or so children, so why not plan ahead and build accordingly, instead of constantly enduring the upgrading process?  The pioneers claimed immediate ownership to the land that they settled, which apparently granted them the authority to rape and pillage it as they did.  This set the standard in the development of our current mind set; the need to upgrade, the commercialism, nature just being there for the taking for our own benefit, and our total disconnect from it.